


Fell and Festive

by NeonGhostCat



Category: Fire Emblem Heroes, Fire Emblem Series, Fire Emblem: Kakusei | Fire Emblem: Awakening
Genre: Christmas, Crack Treated Seriously, Fluff and Angst, Holidays, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, Identity Porn, M/M, POV First Person, Unintentional Redemption, plans gone awry, sort of enemies to lovers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-25
Updated: 2020-12-25
Packaged: 2021-03-10 17:21:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 13,800
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28320804
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NeonGhostCat/pseuds/NeonGhostCat
Summary: Driven half-mad with frustration, Grima decides to take the place of Robin during the winter festival and do some unspecified mischief to Chrom during the celebrations. Things quickly get out of control.(Inspired by the face-swap meme between “Robin: Fell Reincarnation” and “Robin: Festive Tactician”.)
Relationships: Chrom/Gimurei | Grima
Comments: 4
Kudos: 12





	Fell and Festive

**Author's Note:**

> Just a bit of (angsty) fluff for the holidays! 
> 
> I wrote this in about 24 hours (from idea to last word) in order to post it on Christmas. I have since edited it to correct typos, so if you notice any errors remaining, please feel free to let me know!
> 
> Also forgive that it’s in first person POV if you’re not open to reading it — it’s how the story came to me and I didn’t have the headspace necessary to reformat it to third person with the time I had left. If there are enough requests for it, I’ll make a third-person POV version at a later time.
> 
> PS: If I've misunderstood a tag or you can think of a tag that applies, please let me know. :)

_I am the wings of despair. I am the breath of ruin. I am the Fell Dragon, Grima._

This is my mantra. The first thing I say to myself when I awaken each morning and the last thing I say to myself before I sleep.

I almost feel as if I _must_ say it. I have forgotten so much when I was summoned into this world. I feel as if I am losing touch with myself the longer I stay. The worms around me have little fear of me thanks to the _geas_ the Summoner’s magic put upon me. They all know I cannot willingly harm them. Some have even felt emboldened by this and have attempted to make “friends” with me, as if I were some tame creature, rather than someone who has power that surpasses the gods!

Foolish, simpering humans, flocking to my side for fear of what I might do if I somehow manage to thwart the _geas_.

The worst of them is that Chrom.

Every time one of them is summoned into this world, I’m sure to meet him sooner or later. All of us here that bear this face will. Without fail. It is always, _Robin_ this and _Robin_ that. As if I don’t radiate power that mere vessel has never even dreamed of! Seeing that stupid face of the foolish prince light up when he sees me is infuriating. I am not the person they seek! I am a creature greater than that!

The Chroms that stay as a part of the Order of Heroes soon learn to avoid me. I _make_ them avoid me. Some of them need me to be very forceful with the lessons, too. They always look at me as if they were kicked puppies after that, but to my relief will eventually find a “Robin” to clutch at like some stuffed toy and will leave me alone.

I am not the only Grima here. 

We avoid each other even more studiously than we avoid the Chroms or the others who think they have reason to be our “friend” just because we share Robin’s face. If it were not for the _geas_ that forces us to be relatively peaceful, I am sure we would seek ways to absorb each others’ power and take it for our own… and woe betide to those that annoy us after that. 

It is my urge, so I doubt it is much different for the rest. We would all be aware that what one of us desires is likely to hold true for the rest of us.

That is why when I walked into the library and saw a Grima practically wrapped around a Chrom, the two of them locked in a passionate kiss, I felt a killing urge greater than any I had felt since I arrived in this prison of a world. She clearly sensed it, opening her eyes to cast a baleful glance my way over Chrom’s Branded shoulder. She didn’t even break the kiss, simply letting her crimson glare speak for itself. If I even tried to act against “her Chrom” or herself, there would be no mercy, _geas_ or no. I left in as dignified a manner as I could.

I have been filled with a restless fury inside ever since.

Between the _geas_ and the aberrant Grima’s silent threat, there is little I could do but use words to express impotent rage. I could not allow myself to look so ridiculous! But something _must_ be done! How dare she touch one marked by Naga’s Brand as if he were her consort? It was no ruse meant to bedazzle the foolish worm either. He had not even noticed I was there, so there was no need for her to give me such a look — like a dragon guarding a treasure — if she did not mean it.

I could not touch them. Not yet. Perhaps not ever. But I could direct my rage elsewhere. Perhaps some might have called it meaningless to take it out on some other Chrom and not even to be able to kill him. But my rage must go somewhere.

I nursed my grievances for days until finally the Summoner took the Breidablik and a bag of orbs to a summoning stone at the crack of dawn. I followed the Summoner and watched from a distance as they loaded orb after orb into the Breidablik and brought more and more Heroes into this world, subjecting them to the _geas_ be they fair or foul.

As we all were.

Of those summoned, I got what I had been hoping to see: a Chrom! The Branded prince arrived with an entourage, in fact. His sister Lissa, the dark mage Tharja, and… a Robin. All were dressed in winter festival garb — just in time for the upcoming holiday festivities the Order of Heroes was holding. They would hardly be the only worms dressed that way, so they would fit right in.

I watched over the group as they received their explanation from the Summoner and then waited patiently with the other new Heroes that would be brought back to the Order rather than returned to whence they came. Most of them spoke quietly with each other or looked around at the unfamiliar vistas that surrounded the summoning stone.

The festively dressed Chrom hefted a sack over his shoulder and scanned the area as if searching for something. Soon enough, our eyes met across the distance. I watched as his eyes widened before he looked at the Robin at his side and then back at me. There was an expression in his eyes that spoke of curiosity and perhaps amazement at our near identical looks. The expression irritated me, though it was better than the looks many Chroms gave me when they saw me. It must have helped that the Robin he knew was summoned with him and was currently within arm’s reach. 

I stared coldly back at him until the women with them got his attention. I saw Tharja sidle up to Robin to simper up at him. That made me smile as a thought came to me. I left to return to the Order ahead of the group.

It wasn’t precisely that I had a plan, as such, but I saw an opportunity and decided to move.

·͙⁺˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚⁺‧͙⁺˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚⁺‧͙⁺˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚⁺‧͙

The first thing I did was watch the group — particularly Robin — trying to get a feel for their dynamic and any differences from what I expected. Chrom and his sister seemed to interact the same as any of the sibling pair seemed to. She marched to the beat of her own drum and her brother followed in her wake, protecting her. Robin followed Chrom and Tharja followed Robin. When confronted with an unknown, Chrom stepped to the front to take the lead from his sister and Robin automatically took the spot at his right hand. Lissa was pushed to the back and Tharja sank back and lurked behind the princess. It was a pattern that seemed to hold true for every grouping of this four. They fell into it naturally.

The next thing I did was seek to enlist the dark mage. 

I knew the names, faces, and various tidbits about the worms that revolved around the Robins. Tharja was the one who was even more attached to Robin than Chrom — something that seems impossible, and yet… Thankfully, her obsession with Robin _stays_ with Robin and does not extend to Grimas or else I might have been made desperate long before this grouping arrived.

The winter festivities would last three days and nights. I knew that if I could take the place of the Robin who had arrived with the newest Chrom, I would find opportunities to act more easily. I may not be able to kill or maim someone here, but there were any number of ways I could make Chrom suffer and give vent to my rage. 

The mage was key to my plans.

Mere hours after their arrival, I was able to find the scantily clad Tharja alone, huddled miserably in front of a fireplace; wrapped in her spangled cape while the others romped in the snow just outside the room’s window.

“If I told you I could give you three days and nights with your Robin, would you submit to my whims?” I asked as enticingly as possible, nearly purring the words next to her ear.

The woman whipped around, the bell around her neck jangling and the ornaments attached to her ridiculous reindeer horns making little tinkling sounds as her hair and her cape whirled at her movement. Her brown eyes were wide and her face was briefly flushed before her eyes went from mine to the mark on the back of my hand. She tsked and looked away, going from cutely flustered to as chilly as the air outside in the span of seconds.

“Oh, it’s _you_. What do you want?” she shuffled away from the fireplace to stare out the window outside, presumably making up for some momentary lapse in attention paid to me that had been meant to be paid to the Robin outside. I tried not to sneer, torn between irritation and relief.

“You know me?” I asked, mildly curious.

“Ha — of course! Alphonse and Sharena were careful to warn us that the Grimas here did not like to be bothered. As if _I_ cared. It’s not as if you can hurt us. They made _that_ clear too.” She looked over with a smirk, dipping her head forward so her heavy fringe shadowed her eyes, turning the smirk into something vaguely creepy in spite of her seductive looks.

I could feel my lips strain as I tried to keep the smile on my lips in place. I did not mind if she suspected me — that was only natural — but I did not want to give her the satisfaction of knowing she’d scored any sort of effect on me, even if it was as minor as irritation. “I see. That makes things simpler if I don’t need to explain who I am to you.”

“As if you’d fool _me_ for long,” she sniffed, gathering her cloak even closer across her chest as if feeling the chill from the window she stood by.

That made me pause as I wondered why she wore such a skimpy outfit if she was at all sensitive to the cold. Considering Chrom’s garb had no sleeves, it might have been warmer in Ylisse than Askr when they were pulled from their timeline. It was possible I could use that as leverage to get what I wanted from her… But as I did not want it to be mistaken as concern, I dismissed the thought.

“Well? Three days and three nights with your Robin… are you interested?”

She huddled even further, muttering darkly underneath her breath as if she were casting a curse. Presumably her intentions were to frighten me away without pressing her. A miasma even rose from her body, casting a gloom on the room. I simply waited, the smile still on my lips and true satisfaction in my eyes. She was weak to the bait I was dangling and I was not frightened by her act. I understood her to be a hex witch of great power, but my own would likely break anything she was likely to cast on me with barely any effort.

After a few minutes which slid from tension-filled to awkward, her shoulders slumped and her tone became morose. “…I don’t suppose it’d hurt to at least _listen_ to what you had to say… It’s not like you’d leave until you said it, right?”

I chuckled softly.

·͙⁺˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚⁺‧͙⁺˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚⁺‧͙⁺˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚⁺‧͙

Two hours later, I was in possession of one set of festival garb, previously worn by the newest Robin in the ranks of the Order of Heroes, and said Robin was on a quest to obtain “the Holiday Star” for the great tree in the Grand Hall, accompanied by a more practically dressed Tharja. 

With my plausible story about Commander Anna passing the request for the item on to them, they would be out of my hair for at least the three days. If Tharja played her hand correctly, they could be gone indefinitely, though I doubted her abilities to do so. 

To get her to agree to my plan, I merely had to rely on her obsession and the reassurance that my goals were harmless: an opportunity to enjoy the holiday celebrations as “Robin” rather than “the Fell Dragon Grima” and perhaps at most play a prank if I got bored. Her guilt assuaged and her desires provoked, she agreed to lead Robin on a wild goose chase while I slipped myself into the entourage.

The outfit itself was not that dissimilar to my own — barely any changes were made to the familiar other than a differently colored fur-lined coat and the addition of mittens. _Mittens_. Of all things… But they were thicker than my black gloves and would not easily betray me by revealing my Brand, which had apparently not yet shown itself on this Robin’s skin. I might also be able to use the clumsiness of the mittens to excuse myself from any number of things I might find inconvenient. I wore my own gloves under them, just to be sure I could not be talked into exposing the Brand by removing the blasted mittens.

Once I was sure Robin and Tharja had left on their quest, I slipped out of my room and went to join the dozens of Heroes gathering at a nearby field. Today’s event was to be a grand snowball fight. The group that had arrived today had been practicing for it earlier while I had been enticing Tharja with my scheme.

As best I could, I ignored the way the ornaments hanging from the coat swung as I walked. Humans seemed to find all manner of unnecessary things “fashionable” — and that held especially true when holidays or other rituals were involved. They still managed to distract me in spite of my resolve to ignore them. One of the swinging nuisances scraped against the wall of the hall I was proceeding down. The noise when paired with a sense of presence made me turn, seeking whoever it was approaching. As a result, I walked into a wall of muscle.

“Ooof! Ah — steady there, Robin!”

Strong hands caught my shoulders and kept me from being repelled away from the person. The voice was familiar enough by now that I didn’t have to lift my eyes to meet Chrom’s to identify him. The very Chrom I was seeking out, fortunately enough. The stupid “Santa” hat (whatever a “Santa” was) on his head and ridiculous banner-like cape on his back, the taller man looked down at me with his usual dopey grin.

I caught myself before I snapped at him as I normally would have and instead made one of those sickly sweet smiles Robins seemed to wield. “Thank you, Chrom.” His smile warmed and his eyes brightened as he looked at me and I was glad I had taken the time to change the color of my eyes from red to brown as intently as he was staring at me. His hands were still gripping my shoulders gently. “…You may release me.”

He blinked before letting go of me abruptly, taking a step back and laughing awkwardly as he glanced away. “Yeah — sorry about that. Is everything okay? I mean, did you help Tharja with whatever it was she wanted?” The look he tossed me then was very sharp, alerting me that a simple lie was probably better.

“Indeed. Did you find a fourth to replace Tharja for the snowball event?” That was the story that had been agreed to. Tharja was going to decline participating in the events the next few days to take advantage of the library while everyone was busy with the holiday activities. That would explain her absence from the group until she returned.

The other man paused.

“Actually…” Chrom looked a little sheepish. “Lissa said that since the categories for the snowball fight were groups of two or four, she’d rather cheer us on from the sidelines instead of trying to find a replacement. She thought since we arrived this morning, everyone who was interested in playing probably had a group already…”

I considered him a moment and underneath my steady look, Chrom seemed to grow more embarrassed. I savored watching him wither away before I smiled. It wouldn’t do to make him feel _too_ anxious around me, after all. Not yet. “That will be fine. The two of us can coordinate better than a group of three and a stranger…”

Chrom smiled, relaxing again once I let him off the tenterhooks my stare seemed to have put him on. “Yeah. Though I guess all the tactics we were practicing earlier won’t work…” He gave me a look and raised an eyebrow with a sly grin. Clearly, he was asking — no, _challenging_ me to rise to the occasion. In this case, I couldn’t let him down.

“Unless I’m gravely mistaken, we have the time before the match starts. Let’s practice.” 

I turned on my heel sharply and lead the way to an area where I was pretty certain we could practice together without being disturbed. I smiled to myself as I heard Chrom hurry to follow me. That wasn’t so bad. The idea of forcing Chrom to dance to my tune pleased me. The other Chroms just called for Robin to “wake up” and “remember” him. _I know you’re still inside there somewhere_. That was the one that bothered me the most. My hands fisted in the blasted mittens and I tried not to grind my teeth or emit miasma in my agitation.

“Getting pumped?” Chrom asked softly, a hand dropping on my shoulder and drawing my attention. I looked up at him, having almost forgotten he was following me. That must have read as confused or surprised. “You were getting that look you have before you pull out your most crazy plans…” 

His half smile and gentled voice told me he was being kind. As if he’d noticed I was angry, not merely focused. I tried not to frown and looked away from him as I gazed into the snow-covered courtyard I had been leading him to. “…You are unusually attentive when we haven’t known each other for very long…” 

I kept my tone as light as I could, though there was a question there too. Something Tharja had said alerted me to the idea that this Robin and Chrom had met only somewhat recently. It was the reason I’d decided to participate in the contest directly rather than wait until Chrom was tired and perhaps inebriated before associating with him.

Chrom looked sheepish and rubbed the back of his neck somewhat shyly. “Well — it may have only been a few days, but you’ve already saved our necks several times. And you have a similar look when you feel pressured.”

I stiffened, feeling offended, but controlled my anger. It was only natural he would compare me to Robin, after all. It was who he thought I was! If I were going to continue this farce, I needed to play the role properly and strike when the moment was right. I was still searching for that opportunity — that weak spot that would hurt him as much as all the other Chroms had offended me. If I could humble his Robin in the same stroke, that would be all the better. I lowered my eyelashes to smile, savoring the imagined look of betrayal on Chrom’s face and picturing myself watching on the sidelines as he took those feelings out on the Robin he knew. It already tasted sweet in my mouth.

“Thought of something, then?” Chrom asked, sounding vaguely uncertain.

“Yes.” I opened my eyes at him and smiled. “I think we’ll have fun, Chrom.”

·͙⁺˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚⁺‧͙⁺˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚⁺‧͙⁺˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚⁺‧͙

We had roughly a half hour to practice coordinating with each other before resting as we warmed up in the Grand Hall and ate our luncheon. We sat off in a corner together, going over our tactics. In our training I found Chrom to be surprisingly quick to match me. Whether that was his natural abilities to coordinate or if Robin and I shared more in body and mind than I was truly comfortable with, of course I could not know. I tried not to think about it for now as the important thing was to gain Chrom’s trust.

In terms of our conversation, it flowed easily. Chrom understood tactics well enough, so I did not need to explain too much. He even suggested a few things to me that in my laziness I had overlooked or had simply not considered. He was no master of diplomacy by any stretch, but I realized after a few hints that he was reminding me that we would be going up against people on our own level; not common bandits or soldiers. I would have felt embarrassed at the reminder as I had more reason to know this than he, having been a part of the Order for months by this point and he had arrived barely after dawn — except there was nothing in his tone or expression that suggested I was being brought to task.

 _Of course not_ , I realized belatedly. _He thinks I’ve arrived only today, after all_.

While I reeled from the double blow of both my own arrogance in forgetting the other Heroes would likely need more crafty tactics and having for a moment forgotten I was pretending to be Robin, Chrom was changing the subject himself.

“This is nice, I think,” Chrom said. When I blinked over the table at him in confusion he smiled. “We wouldn’t have had this opportunity back home, would we? To practice our tactics with legends and even versions of ourselves. To relax for a few days and just be merry. To get to know each other at our own pace…”

He trailed off and stared at me as if waiting. His eyes, the same blue as his hair, held a peculiar expression I did not know a name for. It was expectant. Hesitant. Curious. Hopeful. Even patient. What those things together meant, I did not know. He wanted something from me and for once I was at a loss for identifying a human worm’s desires. There was no greed there. Nothing to despise. He was a cipher.

“…what?” I asked after a moment, beginning to feel uncomfortable.

He sighed, but smiled as he did. “Nothing. I just wanted to know if you were enjoying yourself. That’s all.”

I looked away across the Grand Hall, avoiding Chrom’s eyes. Lying was as easy as breathing, normally. But I felt as if Chrom would notice if I did, at least if our eyes met. It was not yet time to betray him, so I did not want to get caught. I opened my mouth to agree I was having a wonderful time when it occurred to me there was no lie there. Well, perhaps in word choice. “Wonderful” was not a word I could use without sarcasm attached. However… I did not hate the time I had spent with this Chrom practicing snowball fighting and discussing tactics together.

“How ridiculous,” I muttered under my breath.

“What?”

“No,” said stiffly, realizing I’d spoken aloud.

“Oh, you didn’t?” 

Chrom had that kicked puppy look I hated and I panicked, slamming my palms on the table to get his attention and trying not to bark at him. “That’s not what I meant! Don’t make that face! Bah! Hu-” I caught myself before the word ‘humans’ escaped my lips. I sighed and hung my head, mortified at my loss of control. “H-humbug,” I covered for myself weakly, feeling as if a small part of myself died as I said it.

There was a stretch of silence from Chrom that made me cautiously raise my head to see if he were upset with me. Instead, I saw him doubled over in silent laughter on the other side of the table. I briefly considered taking one of the knives beside our plates and stabbing him, but discarded the idea when I remembered he was probably a better physical attacker than I was right now. My martial skills, specifically my sword and knife skills, were rusty from disuse and Chrom was generally considered to be a master. 

Drat.

Clearly something in my expression amused him further because when he caught a glimpse of me out of the corner of his eye, tears of laughter sprang forth as he tried to smother the laughs. Of course, that only made the urge to laugh intensify. I watched with cold anger as those tears streamed down his face and he was clearly hurting himself trying to keep silent, even as I watched. Absurdly, knowing he was suffering from doing so sated my anger, so my expression eased into a soft smirk as he began to whimper towards the end of his laughing fit.

“G-geeze… You’re so funny!” he wheezed after a few minutes, wiping at his eyes.

“Shut up, you mooncalf…” Hearing my own tone, even I didn’t think the insult was meant as one, which made my face screw up with irritation again. What had gotten into me today?

From his sprawl in the chair, Chrom replied with an easy grin that made my chest ache and my breath catch. “…I’m glad we got to talk.”

“…shut up,” I muttered again, plopping back in my chair and sulking as I pulled up the hood of my coat and hid in it as if cold. I was not blushing. I simply did not want to expose my face to the human’s ridicule.

Chrom chuckled and after he’d finished recovering from his laughing fit, managed to coax me into a discussion about personal interests. I spoke mainly about things I knew Robin and I had in common so I was less likely to give myself away: reading, tactics, combat, and magic. That seemed to be satisfactory to Chrom, so we talked about those things until Commander Anna announced the beginning of the two-person team snowball fight.

As we left the Grand Hall together, I couldn’t help but feel as if Chrom had laid his own trap for me to fall into, but try as I might, I could not see what it was. The thought turned to conviction by the time we took our places on the field and Chrom grinned over at me while making his first snowball.

I turned my frustration on our opponents, virtually devastating the competition. We did not win — likely due to me becoming so focused on venting my anger I didn’t pay enough attention to my partner — but we placed in a respectable third. Chrom seemed pleased, but it effectively felt like failure to me, so I slipped away from Chrom’s blue gaze as soon as I could to regroup.

·͙⁺˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚⁺‧͙⁺˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚⁺‧͙⁺˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚⁺‧͙

Lissa found me shortly before dinner, practically tackling me in the hall as she threw her arms around my waist and clung to my person. “ _There_ you are! Geeze! We’ve been looking all over for you, y’know?”

I cringed slightly at the unfamiliar contact, my arms hovering awkwardly in the air as I tried not to touch the little blonde. “Ah… yes. I got lost…?” I ventured, wondering if she would buy it.

She looked up at me and giggled, but didn’t release me. “Yup! I’ll bet!” I genuinely couldn’t tell if she were being sarcastic or not, so I couldn’t respond. It didn’t appear she expected me to. “C’mon! Stop sulking and let’s go have dinner together, okay?”

I could feel myself frowning and I tried not to either scowl or snarl at her. I wasn’t _sulking_. Clearly. The nerve!

Lissa used my loss for a way to react as an opening to grab my hands and drag me with her as she chirped about this thing or the other. The new friends she made while watching the snowball fight, how excited she was to learn new things while studying with the Order, how ecstatic she was to be considered good enough to be a real Hero, and how worried her brother was that I’d “gotten lost” after the winners were announced. She said it like that — with nearly visible quotes around the words, so I recognized that my excuse was transparent and I tried not to blush at the unfamiliar position of getting caught in a lie.

Since Robin would have, I allowed Lissa to bring me to the Grand Hall again where a banquet was already in sway, in spite of the relatively early hour. The huge room was a chaos of color, light, and noise with seemingly everyone in motion as Heroes streamed in and out of the room, going from one place to another as if they were trying to visit everyone they knew and talk to them all at once. As I had grown used to being relatively on my own except for the battlefield since I was summoned, it was utterly overwhelming. 

I hated it.

“There you are!” Chrom’s voice cut through the cacophony just as he himself made like an arrow through the crowds to join us. His hands found my shoulders yet again and gripped them as if afraid I’d be swept away in the next wave of movement if he didn’t. “Are you hungry? Let’s grab some food and drink and find somewhere quieter to sit.”

I nodded, visibly relieved at the suggestion and too stifled to express it. I felt as if the moment I tried, the dragon sleeping within my human form would emerge and rain destruction on the worms that dared befoul the air with their breaths. I was so torn between my desire to ruin that which I hated and wishing to keep my cover as the human vessel, Robin, I almost didn’t pay attention to Lissa, simply letting Chrom guide me to the food and prompt me to fill my plate with whatever looked appetizing. I obeyed reflexively without truly noting my own selections.

When Chrom guided us to a side room that seemed quieter, Lissa stopped us with a laugh. “Oh — actually? I’m going to sit with my new friends! They’re waving to me. Is that okay?”

I stopped because Chrom did and started to come out of my stupor as I looked between the siblings. I could see Chrom’s natural concern for his lively sister war with the knowledge that there was really no safer place in Askr than in the Grand Hall under the noses of dozens of Heroes. The _geas_ was something he would intellectually know was in effect, so he would know no one here could harm her even if they wished. It also subtly worked to reassure that the Order was trustworthy. Though from the moment of my arrival I could see it for what it was, even I was affected in this way.

“Who are your friends?” Chrom asked, still surprisingly suspicious in spite of the _geas_.

Lissa rolled her eyes, but smiled and pointed to a nearby table, introducing them by name. Some of them were familiar enough for me to absently say, “They’re inoffensive morsels.” I shrugged, my eyes turning to the quieter side room with longing.

Both siblings turned to me with slightly raised eyebrows. “You know them?” they asked, one a beat behind the other and in slightly different tones. I couldn’t distinguish the emotions behind the queries thanks to that and the din of the room. I groaned slightly at my own misstep, though it was a small one. I was making a shocking number of them today. 

“I’ve run into them in the halls. They seem… nice,” I said, trying not to cringe as I said the word. 

I avoided their eyes and tried to edge away from them to enter the side room on my own. If I was not dragged into the brother-sister conflict, perhaps I might make fewer mistakes in front of two sets of sharp eyes. Chrom’s free hand shot out and gripped my shoulder as if catching a pickpocket in the act. He didn’t spare me a glance, quickly quizzing his sister about her new friends while I fought between rage at Chrom’s casual touch and silent order to stay and shock at how automatically I obeyed it. 

I stood there trembling silently under Chrom’s hand, clutching my meal tray until Chrom’s worries had been satisfied and he released his little sister under strict orders not to leave the Grand Hall without checking in with him to let him know where she was going. The princess rolled her eyes with exactly the skill you’d expect an exasperated teenager to display before happily skipping off to the table she’d pointed to earlier.

“Sorry,” Chrom apologized after she’d gone. He gently prompted me with his hand to enter the side room and guided me to a free table as he talked. “I was worried you’d wander off and I wouldn’t be able to find you again.” He seemed genuinely apologetic, as if he knew he’d probably crossed a line with me.

“…it’s fine,” I said quietly, taking a seat and looking with fresh eyes at the clearly random foods I’d piled onto the plate. I tried to identify everything to buy myself time from looking at Chrom.

“Are you sure? You were shaking…” The prince persisted, but his tone was still gentle and his voice pitched low so it wouldn’t carry to the other tables.

I sighed and lifted my eyes briefly. His absurd red and white hat had pushed his fringe into his eyes, giving him a very… approachable kind of attractiveness. As if he were not some human Hero — not a Branded prince. His blue eyes were darkened by the low lighting of the room and within that look was merely a desire to understand me and be understood by me. There were no shadows of suspicion, anger, fear, or greed. Unusual in humans, though I suppose not uncommon in Heroes. Even I could acknowledge that much. Still, having that look directed at _me_ felt unusual. Special, even.

Until I remembered once more that the look was meant for _Robin_ , not myself. I sighed and looked back at my food.

“I suppose I find myself overwhelmed around so many people, that is all. It is different from the battlefield.”

I saw Chrom’s gloved hand snake around our plates to grip my hand over the mitten. Clearly he had been about to say something in relation to the conversation topic, but he was distracted by the blasted mitten. His lips quirked with amusement as he glanced down at them and then up to me.

“…are you going to try to eat with those things on?”

“…no,” I reluctantly acknowledged.

Chrom didn’t ask permission but instead used both hands to remove the mitten from first one hand and then the other. I allowed it, bemused at my own docility. By this point it would be futile to deny it was more than simply keeping my cover as ‘Robin’ that permitted so much from Chrom. I was at a loss to understand it, but it was nevertheless true. Chrom raised his eyebrows to see I wore gloves underneath the mittens and looked back up at me with quirked lips.

“…are you cold?”

“…aren’t you?” I evaded. I wasn’t cold at all. My draconic nature meant that I could shrug off all but the most extreme ends of the scale.

“Hot-blooded,” he shrugged, tossing me a lopsided smile as his hands lingered on mine. Both of us wore gloves, but the contact still felt intimate. I waited, expecting him to say something more, but the moment where he might have faded, leaving us simply holding hands across the table and looking at each other.

A few moments after that realization, I felt a slight disorientation as I was forced once more to adjust my view of Chrom. 

This morning, he had been a dopey worm — a prince Branded by Naga who had some skill with a sword and paid far too much attention to the human vessel, Robin. This afternoon, he had proved himself to be unfettered by common human hungers, a fairly decent tactician, and a surprisingly easy person to talk to. My assessment of his skills of combat had also risen through both our talks and also the proving ground of the snowball fight. If he’d been given a sword rather than a pathetic projectile, I felt we could have won even with my distraction. 

And now… I did not know how I felt about Chrom. There was something in his eyes and touch that settled my rage and drew me in. I did not understand it and I was pretty sure I did not like it. 

No.

I did not like that it was for Robin, not Grima.

Anger stirred within me, spurred by pride. If I wished to, I could force this man to grovel before Grima. That I did not unleash the Fell Dragon to crush him and everyone around us was because they were beneath me to bother. Because I wanted to crush him in other ways. …because the _geas_ was still stronger than I was.

That I remembered the _geas_ last in my list of reasons why not to punish Chrom for daring make me feel out of my depth was just as unsettling as everything else. The expression in his eyes as he looked at me seemed just as bemused as I felt, though without the dismay and rage in my own heart. He didn’t seem inclined to release my hands anytime soon, but he also didn’t seem to be testing me, which at least allowed me some measure of control over myself.

Part of me wished to stubbornly refuse to be the first one to withdraw my hands, but I began to grow concerned about us drawing attention otherwise. I felt at least one pair of eyes burning into us and it was quickly making my skin prickle.

“…Our food is getting cold,” I finally said, my tone flat.

The comment seemed to break Chrom out of whatever sort of trance he’d fallen into and he nearly sputtered, blushing as he let go of my hands so abruptly that it was almost rude. Annoyed, I withdrew my hands and picked up my utensils, ignoring his flustered apologies as I grimly fed myself.

This was ridiculous. I didn’t understand what sort of game Chrom was playing with me. No — not a game. I just didn’t understand Chrom. If I were thinking more rationally, I couldn’t imagine he was trying to deceive me. I was simply forgetting that Chrom thought I was Robin. Trying to assess his motivations from the perspective of what he wanted from _me_ was flawed from the beginning.

The Chrom sitting across from me babbling with increasing degrees of panic was the first that made me feel seen. Intellectually, I knew he was seeing Robin, but because he didn’t use the human vessel’s name very often, it was easy to forget somehow. It must have been the way he was constantly trying to get to know the person in front of him — looking directly at me with his full attention. Open to whatever of myself I revealed to him. He didn’t know “his” Robin very well, so as he tried to learn more, it felt as if he were wanting to know me.

I was disgusted with myself and shamelessly took it out on Chrom by ignoring him as I ate. Only when I felt like Chrom’s mood was going to swing towards revealing he was a lowly worm after all — something I could not abide — did I look up at him. “Sorry — I was thinking of something. Did you speak?”

Chrom’s expression shuttered immediately and I realized I’d made a mistake. I forgot he was good at reading lies. He didn’t frown, but I saw him shift in his seat as he processed my response and tried to decide how he felt about it. I found myself holding my breath, feeling an uncomfortable twist in my stomach as I let my hands slowly set down the fork and knife I’d been using. 

I had lost all interest in my food now.

We stared at each other for almost a solid minute, him trying to resolve whatever he was thinking before he spoke and me wondering why I was so worried about some mere worm’s reaction. But I was. I hated it, but this wait made me feel vulnerable in a way that I couldn’t remember ever feeling before. As I thought that, a pain from my mostly forgotten memories surfaced. I could not identify it other than I was very, very young. That was all I registered before it was lost in the fog with most of my memories once more. And good riddance — I did not wish to remember.

“…if you’re angry at me, you can just say so,” Chrom said after awhile, his voice quiet.

I looked up at him, surprised. I didn’t know how to respond. For once, my arrogance didn’t attempt to reassure me that the human’s assessment of me didn’t matter. As if sensing my hesitation and uncertainty, Chrom reached out to touch the back of my hand.

“If I hurt or offend you; just tell me. We can discuss it. There’s no need to play games. I’m sorry if I upset you — I truly didn’t mean to.”

He was honest. So honest. _Too_ honest.

His words scorched me the way fire and lightning never could. His feelings were laid bare, naked in his eyes. Sincerity that blinded me and made me want to scurry away and hide in shame. I recognized in a moment that this was what drew me to him — this purity I despised humans for not having. But he did. And like he held a mirror, all I could see was how befouled by my own hypocrisy I was.

I could no longer meet his eyes, so I lowered them to where his hand touched my own trembling hand. I wanted to withdraw it and heard a whisper from my own pride try to dictate I do so haughtily while saying something scathing. But I could not bear to. Whatever power Chrom held over me in this moment was absolute.

“…talk to me?” he urged gently.

“Sorry,” I whispered in reply, not even sure he could hear me. I didn’t know what else to say.

“As long as you know… I’m sorry too,” Chrom said, his hand squeezing mine carefully, as if afraid I’d break if he applied too much pressure.

I wasn’t sure he was wrong in that. I felt infinitely fragile.

When I didn’t reply after another long moment, Chrom tried again. “Let’s go get some fresh air, okay? The stars will be out and the night is clear. I hear there are stars you can only see during the three nights of the festival. Let’s look for those, shall we?”

He began pulling the mittens back on my hands with the sort of casual attitude of someone with long practice taking care of someone else. It occurred to me he’d probably looked after Lissa in this way when they were younger. Perhaps not too long ago, too, considering his big brother act before we’d parted ways with her. I permitted it because in the moment, I wasn’t sure I could deny him anything he wanted. 

I let him put the blasted mittens on me again and lead me out a door by one hand. Within a few minutes we found ourselves on a wall with only distant sentries and the stars as our companions. The night sky seemed to go on forever. How he knew of this place, I could not guess. In all of my searches for places of solitude, I’d never come across it myself.

We stood in silence, hands resting on the stone wall as we looked off into the sea of stars and lost ourselves in it for awhile.

“People in my position are always lied to. We have to learn to expect it and see it when it happens. We don’t have to learn to like it,” Chrom said after awhile. “I don’t want the people close to me to feel they have to lie to me. I… want _you_ to be close to me…”

I could feel Chrom look over at me. There was honest simplicity in his words and a note of vulnerability in his voice. I couldn’t look at him to see the same in his eyes. His sincerity — that same thing that caused the Chroms to have that puppy-hurt reaction to me when I lashed out at them — was now a weapon.

“I understand,” I said quietly. It was all I _could_ say. I never wanted to wound him like I had at the dinner table again.

The idea baffled me. What were these ridiculous feelings that had risen within me in the span of a day? Had that rotten witch actually managed to lay a curse on me after all? It was unwelcome, whatever source it sprung from. It was stronger than the _geas_. The _geas_ did not neutralize the violence within me but merely prevented me from acting on it.

Silence descended again, though it was less fraught than before. It wasn’t quite companionable, but every passing moment brought it closer to that place. I no longer felt in danger of fleeing from him. From myself. But I did want some space from Chrom. The longer I was with him, the more blunted my anger against all Chroms became.

I wondered if that was what had happened to that female Grima I had seen in the library. The thought made me shiver with unease.

“Cold?” Chrom asked.

I hesitated, fearing to lie to him. A burst of anxiety rose within me at that. Me? _Fear?_ What foolishness was this? But all the same, I did fear it. Almost haltingly I said, “I… felt a chill.”

Chrom smiled and without asking permission, wrapped his strong arms around me. “Like I said earlier — I’m hot-blooded, so I’ll help with that.”

I flinched, nearly jumping out of my own skin. Then I went very still as my pulse raced and the urge to flee warred with my desire to lean in closer and bask in his warmth and touch. I was no hatchling. I understood attraction well enough. I just had… not felt it to this degree before. Not that I could remember. I felt that if I had, it would not frighten me so.

The way Chrom looked down at me and smiled was so open and innocent I realized that his intentions were probably more pure than my own thoughts were. He was not attempting to seduce me and had no idea he could have with very little effort. This was probably on the level of what an affectionate big brother would do for their younger sibling or a good friend would do to keep the other warm.

Thoughts were born then. First — that I was annoyed to be feeling this way on my own. If I must feel this way, it would have been better if Chrom had wanted me to feel that way or at least had noticed immediately. Second — that I could… indulge. I could seduce _him_. Then when I grew bored, I could abandon him to let Robin deal with the aftermath while I made myself scarce and blended in with the other Grimas and Robins.

My expression as I stared up at him must have been odd because he asked me what was wrong. I simply replied that I was tired and wanted to go to bed. My voice was flat. I was truly exhausted now. I needed to hide away in my room and reassess what I wanted to do. Being impulsive is the reason why I was in this mess to begin with.

Chrom gave me a concerned look, using one of his hands to first test my temperature before brushing his fingers into my hair. Something that simultaneously made me feel warm, thrilled me, and made me wish to strike him down for provoking such intense reactions. I averted my eyes and nodded when he suggested we check in with Lissa first.

Surprisingly, we found her almost immediately upon exiting the tower we’d climbed to reach the wall. She was with a slim girl with long white hair in braids. The girls were both flushed and looked both guilty and giddy as if they’d been caught doing something they shouldn’t.

“Yay! I’m glad we found you!” Lissa said brightly. “I thought you were still eating, but you just left your plates so we started asking around and — well! We found you! Haha!”

My eyes narrowed suspiciously and the girl with Lissa giggled behind two hands pressed to her blushing face. Her eyes were starry as if she had a grand secret she was dying to talk about and she stared between Chrom and myself as if looking at something wonderful. Something about her felt familiar and I could not place what, so I was immediately wary.

“We were just about to look for you, Lissa. I wanted to take him to his bedroom and —” Chrom was interrupted by a slightly muffled high-pitched squeal from the girl with braids. After a confused glance to make sure the girl was okay, Chrom awkwardly finished. “Er… you should call it a night too.”

“Oh!” Lissa’s friend broke out before Lissa could answer. “She’d miss the thing! The — uhm… caroling around the tree thing at midnight thing, yeah!” The girl was so eager she kept stumbling over her words. “I promise she’ll get to her room safely after! I know this place like the back of my hand! You’ve been put in the Gebo Dormitory, right? It’s either that or Berkana, but I’ll bet it’s Gebo because they have four empty rooms all together.”

“Uhm — yes, actually. Gebo,” Chrom said almost helplessly. The girl was so eager she was leaning into his personal space.

“I’m in room 422!” Lissa volunteered cheerfully. “Nina and the others can definitely get me there safely! Isn’t it okay if I spend more time with them, Chrom? I’m sure he doesn’t want to stay up too much later, so if you tried to wait up for me, wouldn’t that be super mean to him?”

My brows furrowed slightly as I caught something in the conversation. But I was so mentally and emotionally exhausted that when it didn’t immediately come to mind, I just let it go. I could see the two teenage girls were going to argue in tandem until Chrom had to give in, and to spare us all the hassle I just interjected my own opinion. “Let Lissa enjoy the festivities, Chrom. It’s safe and there are too many responsible types here for anything to untoward happen. And Lissa seems capable.”

All three pairs of eyes snapped to me, a few of them looking a little surprised. The girls smiled warmly — Lissa actually stepped forward to give me another squeezing hug around the waist, claiming I was “the best” before releasing me to give her brother the most blatant puppy eyes I’d ever seen. At this point, I was considering doing the same just so I could escape the madness for a few hours.

Chrom sighed. “Fine. But don’t stay up too late. I’ll be getting you up for breakfast no matter what hour you slept.”

“Oka~y!” Lissa said, beaming. “Good night!”

“Have fun!” Nina added with a grin.

Chrom was clearly confused, though that was when it registered for me what the girls thought was going on. And probably why they were so insistent on letting us leave together. 

Ah. Well. They weren’t nearly wrong enough for my comfort, though I imagine it had never crossed Chrom’s mind. For all of the Chroms’ attachment to the Robins, I had never seen them together as a couple unless the Robin was female. I suppose in the infinite variations of the worlds the Breidablik could summon from, there was always a chance it could happen between them, but it must not be something Chrom was easily inclined towards. And that was with the _Robins_ … How could he be interested in a male Grima?

Thankfully the discussion about the dormitory halls reminded me not to go to my own room in Uruz but instead lead the way to Gebo. It didn’t matter to me as Robin would not be coming back to the room assigned to him. Though my own lair would have been preferable, it was less of a hassle to go to the room assigned to Robin. I let Chrom lead me to the door, grateful that he seemed to be lost in thought and bid me goodnight at the door.

I shed the festive garb immediately upon entering the room and crawled into bed to attempt to escape the day and my own thoughts by sleeping.

·͙⁺˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚⁺‧͙⁺˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚⁺‧͙⁺˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚⁺‧͙

The next day I woke and stared at the ceiling for over an hour, trying to sort things out in my head.

I found myself attracted to Chrom. I had no desire to lie to him ever again. I did not truly wish to hurt him any longer. Those feelings from the night before remained. I did not care for them, but the idea of forcing myself to do anything else felt distasteful and childish. I did not wish to feel those things, however. It would be better to slip out of Chrom’s life again without having done anything. 

Robin would return soon enough. Until then, I would need to stay with him for if I disappeared, he would probably take the castle apart brick by brick until he found me. And that, too, was a problem. When the real Robin he knew returned, chances were that an impostor in their midst would be discovered immediately. I imagined that Chrom would look for me in that case too, though I had no desire for him to find me. 

I could request that the Summoner send me home. If one’s desire was strong enough, the Summoner would do so. No one knew what happened to you after that. Whether you retained all your memories and skills you’d learned and experienced while in Askr or forgot them as I had my own past upon coming here. It would be a blessing to forget. I had the strong feeling that the Chrom in my world no longer existed. I would never have to feel this way again if I returned home. I could grow strong, destroy whatever I liked, and never be controlled by anything. I would never feel this vulnerable again. I would not have to see Chrom’s expression when he learned I had lied to him this whole time.

By the time Chrom collected me for breakfast I had made my decision. I would hold out until Robin returned from the Holiday Star quest and then ask the Summoner to send me home. Hopefully before Chrom had any idea of what happened.

I knew myself to be acting in a cowardly manner. I made no excuses for it. I was a coward.

·͙⁺˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚⁺‧͙⁺˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚⁺‧͙⁺˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚⁺‧͙

The day passed in a surprisingly easy manner. The three of us ate breakfast together — a much quieter affair than dinner had been — and while Lissa went off to play with her new friends, Chrom took me ice skating. 

It wasn’t something I’d ever done before, but my body took naturally to it as it felt similar to flying. Chrom seemed somewhere between disappointed and impressed that he had little to teach me, but he quickly enjoyed that instead of spending our time fumbling at the edges of the frozen lake like most of those there, we could challenge each other to attempt feats. 

Every so often, a blue-haired woman in a maid’s costume requested we all leave the ice to enjoy hot beverages while she refroze the surface to prevent accidents. During those times, the two of us huddled together in the nearby tent and drank our hot chocolate or tea. We spoke mostly of immediate, simple things — the beverages, the ice magic, the stunts we were considering attempting when we were let back on the lake.

Some of the looks Chrom gave me indicated he was aware something was different about my behavior. Once he even invented a reason to test my temperature with his hand again. When we broke for lunch, he insisted we stay inside by the fire. We passed the afternoon in one of the smaller libraries, reading by the fire and sometimes exchanging excerpts from what we were reading. It… should have been boring, but I enjoyed it as much as the morning’s ice skating.

I felt helplessly out of my depth. Though I’d tried to put some distance between myself and Chrom, Chrom had a way of drawing me deeper before I’d noticed. I was glad I only needed to try to keep this up for another few hours. I did not wish to drown.

·͙⁺˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚⁺‧͙⁺˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚⁺‧͙⁺˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚⁺‧͙

“Chrom?” As we walked towards the Grand Hall on our way to dinner, I decided to bring the topic of the next day up now, where it could be over and done with. He made a thoughtful sound of acknowledgment and looked over at me. I chose my words very, very carefully. “Tomorrow… In the morning I think I’m going to go talk to the Summoner. You probably won’t see my face until later in the day, so no need to wake me up for breakfast.”

“The Summoner? Is anything wrong?” There was a sharpness in his eyes that told me that in spite of my best attempts, he’d picked up on something. Nothing I said was a lie, but I was certainly deceiving him. For someone who looked so easy to fool, why was he so blasted _sharp_? Was it all Chroms that were this way or just this one?

“I’d like to know more about how Summoning works,” I said. It was the truth.

“Why so early?” Chrom asked, just a touch of suspicion in his tone and on his face.

I couldn’t help but smile slightly, inclining my head. “…I’ve noticed that the Summoner is up in the early hours. It is the best time to approach and I doubt there are many who would like to be awake at those hours. You —” I broke off, realizing I’d almost said “you were Summoned at dawn”. I corrected my mistake as smoothly as I could, feigning having to clear my throat. “You noticed we were summoned at dawn, right?” I kept my eyes low as I said the first thing that counted as a lie.

Chrom’s breath hissed softly through his teeth and his feet slowed until he stopped. I stopped too to look up at him and his hands went to their usual place on my shoulders. I could almost see the gears turning in his eyes as he searched my expression. But there was no guilt for him to find in my face. I felt none. I was sure this would hurt less than any other method of parting. Some Fell Dragon I was. I wanted no part of my breath of ruin to touch Chrom. My wings of despair were for me alone. At least here. At least with Chrom.

“… try to come to breakfast,” Chrom eventually said.

I smiled. “That will all depend on the Summoner. I have a lot of questions.” Seeing his brow furrow and his lips begin to shape new words, I quickly added. “I won’t keep the Summoner up if they need to sleep.”

That seemed to confuse Chrom enough that whatever he’d been about to say was lost. Before he could regain that train of thought Lissa joined us and smiled up at us both with such an impish expression that even I was immediately suspicious, much less Chrom.

“Lissa…” Chrom said warily.

“Hi!” she chirped back at him, arms tucked behind her back. “Are we ready to go in and have dinner?”

“…Yes…” Chrom’s tone made the word almost a question. “Are you eating with us tonight, then?”

“Uuuhm!” Lissa looked as if she got caught out and I watched, interested to see where this was going. “Well, I mean — I wanted to say hello and chat with you two a little before I joined my friends, since I hadn’t seen you two since breakfast!” I exchanged glances with Chrom. It didn’t take a genius to know something was up. When neither of us said anything, but instead gave her steady stares, Lissa got frustrated and stomped her foot. “Oh — just, come on already!” 

She grabbed a hand from each of us and dragged us towards a particular set of doors to the Grand Hall. I looked over at Chrom who mouthed the word “prank” to me, and rolled his eyes with a smile and a slight shrug. There was something charmingly intimate about this exchange that made my heart skip before I tried to smother the feeling. It was so dangerous. Such a dangerous feeling when I was so close to parting ways with him.

I was so caught up in those thoughts that when Lissa released our hands as we came through the doorway, I almost lost my balance. Chrom caught me before I fell and held me against his side.

“Oh — _perfect!_ ” a girlish voice cooed overhead. “Mistletoe! Now kiss!”

Chrom and I looked up to see the girl Nina on a ladder, attaching mistletoe and a ribbon to the garland above the doorway.

“Excuse me?” Chrom stammered, blushing slightly.

“If you don’t kiss, you can’t come in — those are the rules!” Lissa quickly said from in front of us, rocking back on her heels as if she were silently laughing at us, though it was a warm, affectionate sort of laughter rather than malicious.

Still, I found myself blushing too. I couldn’t look at Chrom.

“Lissa, enough,” Chrom said shortly, his tone embarrassed.

I tried to slip out of Chrom’s hold and enter the room, escaping the situation entirely. Only I was stopped by a large hand gently pushing me by my chest back to Chrom. “Now now — rules are rules,” a handsome man with an eye patch purred. His mussed hair was nearly the same color as mine and he radiated so much sensuality that it seemed almost natural when he added, “Though, if you’d rather not kiss _him_ , I don’t mind if you kiss _me_ instead.”

“ _Daddy!_ ” Nina protested from the ladder, though she immediately giggled and called to her friend. “Oh no, Lissa — what do I do? That’s not a bad pairing either!”

“Nina!” Lissa scolded, though she giggled too.

Chrom frowned and started to step forward, prompting the man with the eye patch to grin. “No need to get defensive, Prince. It’s a harmless holiday tradition, isn’t it? Someone has to kiss someone. May as well be the two of you, right? It doesn’t have to be on the lips if you’re shy.” His dark eye danced with amusement and his voice seemed to curl seductively around each word. Devils must sound like him.

I turned, intending on suggesting Chrom give me a kiss on the cheek so we could get on with it. But apparently Chrom had the same thought I did. His lips met mine rather than the cheek he’d presumably been aiming for. We both froze and broke away. I ignored the squeals from the two teenage girls and the low chuckle from the devilish man in favor of flicking my eyes to the nearby tables of cheering soldiers lifting their glasses to us in a toast.

Before I could decide whether to get angry or slink off into the night, Chrom’s hands found my shoulders and directed me away from everyone. I was confused, but let it happen as I was pretty sure it was safer than letting my emotions dictate what I did to relieve my embarrassment. I soon found myself alone with Chrom in some side hall attached to the Grand Hall, pressed gently into the shadows and into a corner. Chrom’s larger body shielded me from any passersby.

“Are you… all right?” Chrom asked somewhat nervously. “I’m sorry — I meant to give you a peck on the cheek not…”

“Yes, of course. I know. It was just… embarrassing with the reactions from everyone,” I managed to say, trying to sound cool and relaxed, but really just as nervy as Chrom seemed to be. His face was still flushed. “I know you only did it because of the peer pressure. Don’t worry about it.”

I thought adding the last bit would reassure Chrom that it was nothing to stress over. He could just forget it.

Instead, he pulled back to look at me as if I’d said something surprising. His eyes were wide and his lips were parted. “I… no. I…” When I waited for him to finish his thought, that seemed to be enough to break whatever he was holding back. He didn’t say anything but instead took my chin in his hands, guided my face to an angle he wanted, and then dropped his lips to mine.

He gave me time to react. All the time in the world to say something, push him away, or even move myself. Instead I obediently waited for his lips to fit themselves to mine. I didn’t kiss him back, but I closed my eyes to savor it and parted my lips for him at the shy touch of his tongue.

As I was not entirely unresponsive, Chrom kissed me until we were both breathless. When the kiss ended, his forehead dropped to mine and I could tell his eyes were also still closed. We stayed like that for awhile as we caught our breaths. It was if we both knew the second our eyes opened, things were going to get complicated. We put it off as long as possible, me leaning back into the corner and him sheltering our moment together as best he could.

When my breath settled, my heart began to ache. I could bear it no longer and whispered, “…Chrom.”

My tone must have said all that was necessary. He kissed me again, more urgently this time. With more heat. I again submitted to the kiss. This time I tentatively returned it. Not with as much passion as he gave me — I was afraid to — but enough that his hands moved to grip at my sides. I could feel his body tense with restraint. He wanted to do more than this.

This time we were panting by the time we broke the kiss. I gently pushed him away at arm’s length, gripping the fur trim of his stupid cape as I caught my breath. My arms trembled as the conflicting desires to run away and draw him close warred. My eyes were squinched closed. The moment I saw his face I knew my body would decide for me on what to do and I wanted to choose myself.

“Please…” Chrom whispered to me, his voice almost hoarse. The sound of it made my heart clench. “…talk to me.”

I shuddered and drew a shaky breath. “…I need to think.”

“But—” Chrom started. I could feel his fingers clutch at the wide belt on my waist as if he were going to hang onto it like a harness. 

“Please, Chrom… I need to think. I—” I was shaking again. I didn’t understand what was happening to me. How I could have been an entirely different person two days ago. How everything I wanted now hinged on who I was, when I didn’t even know that myself.

He said something as he released me, but I didn’t hear. I bolted and ran blindly. I found myself in my own bedroom, locked inside. I took a stress nap to escape and when I woke again close to dawn, it was if I’d never slept at all. I’d told Chrom I wanted to think, but I couldn’t. What I wanted and what I thought I should do were incompatible. I was afraid and learned that one could be more afraid of a broken heart than a broken body.

After almost an hour of my mind running in circles, I stood, stripped myself of the offensively cheerful holiday outfit, and dressed in my usual clothes instead. I sought out the favorite haunts of the Summoner.

·͙⁺˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚⁺‧͙⁺˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚⁺‧͙⁺˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚⁺‧͙

“Go home?” the Summoner asked softly, their husky voice as genderless as they seemed to be. 

The Summoner always wore their hood up in public. I did not know if they were male, female, or identified as neither. I knew little about what they looked like other than the tone of their skin and that they had a mouth I would describe as sensual. The outfit they wore was surprisingly similar to my own, so it hid their figure well.

I knew that the Summoner was close to several of the Heroes here and those Heroes knew more about the Summoner and where they came from. But someone like me — someone who had only ever shouted angrily at the person I had felt ripped me from what was rightfully mine — knew nothing. Not even the name they called themselves by.

In retrospect, just that was enough to feel damning. A person like myself with someone like the Chrom I knew? What a pitiful mismatch. I felt sorry for Chrom for even considering it. It was indeed better that I returned home, stripped of my memories, if possible. Two or three thousand years of sleep in some forgotten cave might mend what was broken in me.

“No,” the Summoner said after awhile, filling the silence that surrounded us on the hill the summoning stone protruded from.

“N-no?” I stammered, surprised and feeling almost injured by the blunt refusal.

“You’re not ready, are you?” When I just stared at them, they added. “I don’t know as much as you would think about this — but I do know this: your heart is locked here. I cannot send you home. There is nothing for me to do. If you truly want to go home, you have to resolve whatever it is that keeps you tied here.”

I felt myself deflate as my held breath released. I could not argue with the Summoner. I could feel it was the truth. But I still did not know what to do.

Perhaps taking pity on me, the Summoner approached me and gently petted my hair, as if they knew I would accept the touch this time. Feeling almost as if I would cry, I closed my eyes and asked, “You know I am not Robin…”

They chuckled softly. “I know exactly who you are. That is how the _geas_ works. I am tied to all of you as well. You’ve changed so much recently, haven’t you? …be kind to yourself, Grima. Since you arrived here, you have been letting go of the baggage you came here with. You’re not the monster you think you are. And you can be whoever you wish to be here.”

The Summoner then drew me to their shoulder and held me as I sorted through my feelings. Truthfully, I did not wish to go home. I was just too scared to reveal myself to Chrom and be rejected. The Summoner soothed me. Listened to me whisper some of the fears I carried within my heart, and encouraged me. But they did not tell me what I should do. I still needed to decide that for myself.

When the Summoner left me, I stayed by the summoning stone and stared off into the distance as the sun rose. I felt as if I’d been reborn, and the feeling left me just as weak.

I could be a Grima that no longer sought destruction. Well — apart from the battlefield. I am not sure those feelings would ever truly die and it was best to channel them where they would do good. 

I could be a Grima that loved. The Summoner offered to be my friend, so I would not have nothing if Chrom rejected me. I requested that if that happened, I wanted to be sent somewhere far away from the Order. To be sent to the battlefield again and again. They had smiled and given me more pets that made me simultaneously pleased and annoyed. They called me a cat when I grumbled about it, but in the end they did promise that they would put me on a priority battle squad if that was what I wanted.

Just knowing what would happen if my heart was broken was reassuring. I knew even if Chrom rejected me, I had somewhere to go. Because I did not think it would be enough to make me leave. Not as long as he was here, somewhere.

I stayed there until the last star faded from the sky and then I returned.

·͙⁺˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚⁺‧͙⁺˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚⁺‧͙⁺˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚⁺‧͙

I bribed one of the little dragons to bring Chrom a message as I could not muster the courage to approach him directly. The child’s time was purchased with a mere promise of later playtime. Her sweet admission that she’d wanted to play with me for a long time but was scared to ask hit hard on my newly softened heart and I unbent enough to pet her hair much as the Summoner had mine before I sent her on her way.

I did not know this new me.

Facing the world like this was frightening. A softer heart was so easily touched and I was afraid for it.

I made my way to the wall Chrom had brought me to that first night. There were no stars to see, but it was private and it was somewhere that meant something to us. If things went poorly, we could easily avoid this place if necessary. It was a nice, neat little plan I had. But waiting for Chrom was more difficult than I’d anticipated. Every sound made me flinch with expectations of his arrival. When he finally did, I barely reacted, certain that once again it was a false alarm.

Almost casually, I looked toward the door I expected him from and Chrom stood there, staring at me with an expression as if he’d seen a ghost. He didn’t look as if he’d slept well.

“Chrom?” I asked, concerned.

He made his way to me in slow, cautious steps before enveloping me in a hug. “…you stayed,” he whispered against my ear.

“…I stayed,” I confirmed after a moment. “…you knew?” I asked hesitantly.

I felt him nod and after a long silence he said, “I don’t know what it is about you. But even when you’re not lying directly, I get these flashes of insight. A gut feeling about what you want to do.”

I winced. “That… can’t give you a good opinion of me, Chrom. I’m not exactly—”

Chrom interrupted me, hands moving to my face to almost grip on either side of it as he stared deep into my eyes. My red eyes, not Robin’s brown. If he’d yet noticed the difference, there was still no reaction. Instead, his voice was a rough whisper as he spoke. “Promise me you won’t have the Summoner send you back.”

The conversation was already so far astray from where I thought it would go, all I could do was try to keep up with Chrom and follow his lead. “…I promise. For as long as you are here, I will not be sent home by the Summoner.”

Relief filled Chrom’s expression and he dropped his head to my shoulder. Remembering what the Summoner had done for me, I awkwardly pet his hair and back, at a loss of how to proceed from here. At what point was it good to drop that I was not Robin on him? If I had associated with others more often, would I know this sort of thing?

“Chrom, I… don’t exactly… know how to do this.”

“It’s fine — we’ll figure it out together. All we need to do is talk things out. If it’s the two of us… I know we can make things work.” His arms snaked around my waist — both to my pleasure and dismay.

“I… that’s… Uhm. That’s not what I meant. You don’t know who I am. I don’t know how you can say these things,” I continued, feeling somewhat helpless.

Chrom finally lifted his head and offered me a wry smile. His face was endearingly flushed and his eyes were gentle. “Like I said — the two of us can make this work. All we need to do is talk. And… don’t forget my insights. We’ll get to know each other bit by bit. At whatever pace you’re comfortable with. As long as you don’t leave, we have the time.”

I stared at him, starting to understand what he was trying to say. What he was hinting at as he looked at me with his steady gaze unclouded by doubt. Almost panicking, I blurted out. “I’m not Robin — I’m Grima. Your Robin is somewhere with Tharja—” I stopped myself and my eyes widened almost in horror. Chrom was smiling at me with almost no change in expression other than a twinkle of humor in his eyes. “Since… since just before the snowball fight…” A smile tugged at his lips and he pulled me closer. “…I’ve been lying to you this entire time…” I finished almost pleadingly.

Chrom chuckled. “I know. I’ve known almost from the first moment. It was the way you looked at me — like the way you looked at me when we were Summoned here. I didn’t know what you wanted, but when we caught Tharja lying about the Holiday Star, Robin and I decided to go along with it. The excuse you gave her… I wondered if it were true. The bit about wanting to not be Grima for awhile.”

I made a strangled sound that was so far from dignified I felt another piece of the Fell Dragon Grima die. I had failed that badly? Since even before we ran into each other at the hallway? They had all known, but still gone along with it? 

“W-why?” I sputtered.

Chrom smiled and placed a chaste kiss on the corner of my mouth. “The holiday spirit? …that’s what I’d like to say. Truly, it was because the moment our eyes met for the first time, my heart told me you were who I was waiting for. I could never have found you in my world. In my world, my father managed to send Grima into a thousand year sleep. But that Grima wouldn’t have been you, would it?”

After a moment, I slowly shook my head. “I… don’t remember much about my life before I came here. But I think once I took Robin as my vessel, I razed all the known kingdoms to the ground. I… am sure the Chrom in my world…” I couldn’t bring myself to say it.

Chrom pet my hair and gave me a reassuring nuzzle of his face against mine. “But that’s not you anymore, is it?”

“…no,” I agreed.

“Sometimes I’m told I’m rash — even reckless. I have no problem deciding I want to be with you, Grima. It’s sudden and you’re still figuring yourself out. But I’m willing to match your pace. Are you willing to try?”

I stared up into his eyes, fully realizing that this entire time he really _was_ looking at me. Not Robin. To him, once he recognized I wasn’t Robin, he’d only been looking at me. So everything he’d said and done…

“I… love you,” I said softly, my voice trembling too much to say it any louder. “I don’t understand these feelings, but they must be ‘love’. I’ve never… I don’t know anything about it, so you’ll have to be patient and explain things. …please.”

If humans lived life this way, no wonder they were mewling worms. How terrifying these feelings were. No wonder they begged the gods to save them and didn’t know how to respond when their prayers were answered. The gaze that Chrom held me in was steady and warm. It was the only reason I was able to speak at all.

“I love _you_ , Grima. For a thousand different reasons now, but they will grow the more I know about you and the more you discover about yourself.”

I felt as if he’d intended to kiss me after the return speech, but by that time I was trembling too much. Instead, he gathered me to him and held me that was both like and unlike the way the Summoner held me. I felt comforted and safe, but the depth of feeling was entirely different. I trusted the Summoner not to hurt me. I trusted Chrom to love me.

Looking back, I’m not entirely sure how that happened. How he’d slid into my heart through some gap and made a home for himself there. I would not have thought I had a heart at all beyond the organ that resided in my chest. But I knew it belonged to Chrom.

·͙⁺˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚⁺‧͙⁺˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚⁺‧͙⁺˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚⁺‧͙

When we left our spot on the wall and rejoined the rest of the world, we found Robin and Tharja using a pair of ladders on either side of the huge tree in the Grand Hall. Between them they held a huge star ornament they were carefully bringing to the top of the tree. Unconsciously, my hand sought out Chrom’s as we watched what could only be the Holiday Star being affixed to the top of the tree.

I’d thought I’d made it up.


End file.
